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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24834718">Lilyflower</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldendragon/pseuds/goldendragon'>goldendragon</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Son of Many Worlds [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, The Magicians (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bullying, Canon-Typical Prejudice, Crossover, Crossover Pairings, F/M, Gods Are Jerks!, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Mind Control, Minor Character Death, Pregnancy, The Beast Is His Own Warning</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 05:00:48</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>9,974</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24834718</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldendragon/pseuds/goldendragon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jane Chatwin has a plan to destroy The Beast once and for all but before she sets her plan in motion for the first (of 40) times she plans a magic-free vacation a single lifetime to recapture the childhood she lost. Unfortunately for her, the 'magicless' world she chooses is anything but. Now as Lily Evans she must navigate a new world of magic and hope it doesn't cause as much heartache as her previous one. She didn't expect to fall in love or fight another madman to save the world. </p><p>Ratings and warnings may change (probably will :)</p><p>**Changes made to chapters 1-6 as of April 11, 2021**</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>James Potter/Jane Chatwin, James Potter/Lily Evans Potter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Son of Many Worlds [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1796416</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>Lily flower-A Prequel </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>by: goldendragon</strong>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Chapter One </strong>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <strong>Jane Chatwin-Brakebills</strong>
  </span>
</p><p> </p><p><em><span>Jane</span></em> <span>looked into the mirror with tired eyes. If exhaustion had a smell she imagined she would stink with it. That’s all she was anymore, exhausted and achingly sad. She had just come from her sister’s funeral. Helen had died in her sleep at a ripe old age. They were all gone now. Just Martin and her were left and if she had anything to say about it she would soon be the only living Chatwin. </span></p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She</span>
  </em>
  <span> set down with a sigh and put her aching head into her hands. Finally, she had an idea of how to stop her monstrous brother. The preparations were complete and her plan was soon to begin. She found herself wishing she could sleep for a century and she could if she wanted but the truth was more than exhaustion plagued her. She had watched as her brother Rupert had settled down and felt envy. He had moved on from Fillory and found himself something to live and ultimately to die for. He had died a hero even if only his fellow magicians knew of his true contributions to World War 2. She had only her fight with Martin to look forward to. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She </span>
  </em>
  <span>found it difficult to picture life after their fight. This fight to defeat her brother was an obligation she assigned herself. Rupert and Helen had refused to return to Fillory after Fiona’s death and left it to their brother’s rampant cruelty and tyrannical rule. She supposed she loved Fillory still. Even after it had taken so much from her, She felt she owed it to the Fillorians and her siblings and she had once ruled over as kings and queens and to what was left of her brother to save them from each other. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Still,</span>
  </em>
  <span> she found herself wishing her siblings and she had never found that damn clock in Aunt Maude's house. If they hadn’t would they have lived simple and happy lives, free from the pleasure-pain that came with magic? Deliciously ordinary and wonderfully dull lives. It was then an idea struck her. She had the time, after all, she thought, chuckling darkly, she had nothing but time. She could take a vacation from Fillory, from her brother. Just one lifetime of uncomplicated joy. “Yes, she said, I’ll have one life of freedom and then to war. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jane Chatwin-Other Earth, Cokeworth, English Midlands, England</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She </span>
  </em>
  <span>found an earth devoid of magic and chose an ordinary English family to infiltrate. The mother named Daisy was a lovely woman with warm brown  eyes and soft brown waves a few shades lighter than she remembered her eldest sister's. She reminded her so much of her own mother, Emma that it brought tears to her eyes. The father Edgar, on the other hand, was nothing like her own dashing soldier father. He was a homely man but with his booming laugh,  auburn curls, ever-present smile, and eyes a rich forest green he drew the eye. Her own pale green orbs were not near so pretty and it was no hardship to transform her eyes to match his own. They had one child.  A little girl of four named Petunia. Nothing in her reminded Jane of her vibrant and doomed sisters and for that she was grateful. Using her magic for hopefully the last time in this new world she began to shrink. Regressing in age until were there was a woman grown now stood a primly dressed three-year-old. She walked calmly over to the bespelled family and spoke. “ I am your daughter, she knew of Daisy’s love of gardening and flower names, my name is Lily and I am three years old.” Then she took her new mother’s hand and with that, the Evans family gained a second child. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Her</span>
  </em>
  <span> papa hummed a silly tune as he cooked breakfast. It was summer and while he usually had the summer off (meaning the family had more opportunities for travel) had decided to teach a summer course. “Why can’t we go to Paris mama. Shelly and Elizabeth are going. I was so embarrassed when they asked why we weren’t going.” Petunia’s whine was edging close to that chalkboard and nails she was so good at and Lily winced and tried to rub her ears discreetly. Mama kissed Papa before helping him plate and serve the food. “Petunia sweetheart we went to Paris last summer. This summer your father was given the chance to teach an advanced course and you know how much he has wanted this opportunity, she patted Petunia’s hand, and we as his family must be supportive. Now dig in.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Her</span>
  </em>
  <span> father was a Professor at Vortigern College and on days when their mama needed quiet to work on her paintings, they would take the short walk to the college and sit in on his classes. While Petunia found it dreadfully boring Lily adored the stimulation. Today they would be going in with their father as their mother was desperate to finish a commissioned piece and needed absolute quiet and serenity while working. As the girls had gotten older they had been allowed more freedom and were not required to sit in on his classes anymore. After giving them a bit of pocket money and demanding they meet at the college's quaint cafe for lunch they were set loose. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Getting</span>
  </em>
  <span> frustrated Petunia stamped her foot on the grass and yelled. “You're not playing fair Lily. Your cheating.” Lily shook her head and smiled mischievously at her pouting sister. “ No I wasn't, you just don’t hide very well.” Hissing her sister flounced off to tattle or sulk in peace. Shaking her head Lily laid down on the grass and looked up into the dappled sky. She really was terrible at the game but Lily indulged her with a fondness she had unexpectedly gained for the child. While sullen and petulant her new sister was also soft-hearted like crying when they found an injured bird in their garden and Lily found herself loving her and her chosen family which was unexpected but not unwelcome. It was nice having a sibling again. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The</span>
  </em>
  <span> first year of her new life had been just what she wanted. Peaceful in a way she hadn’t experienced even before Fillory. Her time spent at the college watching her father attempt to teach brats the fine and noble art that was the British Novel and enjoy his work regardless of if the dunderheads ever actually listened and sharing her mother's love of gardening and painting both hobbies often ending in laughter and mess. Many afternoons were spent in the walled garden at the back of their cottage, their parents drinking tea and eating biscuits as the girls played around them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>These</span>
  </em>
  <span> were lazy, happy days and they filled her with quiet joy but under it all, she felt a restlessness grow in her heart. Despite her determination to not even think the word magic she found herself missing the burning heat of it coursing through her hands as she cast. She missed it. She missed magic and it pissed her off. She had chosen this world specifically because it was magicless as far as she could sense apart from natural leylines and the like. She tried to channel her restlessness into her studies excelling at preschool to the point where her teachers had considered bumping her up a grade or two. While this had filled her parents with pride and her sister with envy she hadn’t wanted to skip ahead. This was her second chance at a proper childhood and she didn’t want to miss any of it so with much effort she had managed to talk the school and her parents into letting her stay in her regular class and attending a small study group for advanced students on the weekends. She would be starting the new classes tomorrow and while she was grateful for the distraction she still felt the itch. Her fingers twitched and a bright blue flower bloomed beside her. The itch went away if only for a moment. She sighed and plunked the bloom. Giving up magic was proving more difficult than she’d expected. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Lily gains a friend and learns that magic isn't as absent from this new world as she thought.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u">
    <strong>Chapter Two </strong>
  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <strong>Lily Evans-Advanced Studies, Cottage Classroom of Ms. Ameila, and Miss. Hilda </strong>
  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The</span>
  </em>
  <span> teachers of her advanced studies class, a mother-daughter duo who taught the class in their own home and only accepted ten students on recommendation from the local schools were a silly absent-minded bunch. They often went on tangents that while both educational and deeply entertaining were not at all what they had been teaching at the time but for those who could follow their ramblings they were fascinating and thoughtful instructors. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There were four boys and six girls in the class. A few of them were the children of professors at the college like she and others were gifted children from neighboring villages. One of the other students was a sallow-skinned boy with lanky black hair and eyes that could be fey if for the whites of his eyes. He stood off to the side during introductions and spoke the bare minimum to any inquiries the teachers made. When she saw the hand-shaped bruises on his arm she sighed and when during the lunch break she noticed him glancing longingly at the other student’s lunches she frowned. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>During</span>
  </em>
  <span> the lunch break between lessons, she calmly walked over and handed him half of her sandwich and some apple slices. He looked confused and then angry. “I don’t want your food...I’m not hung…” She had walked away before he could finish and determinedly ignored the baleful glare he sent her way. This went on for several days before he confronted her. “Why are you doing this?” He sneered but his eyes looked more cautious than angry and that she could work with. “My mum has a tendency to make too much food. Like she’s afraid I’ll starve for the few hours I’m away.” She grinned ruefully and let out an amused snort when he looked skeptical. She couldn’t help it. He looked like he was clearly questioning her sanity. Which to be fair many had. Fogg had turned it into an art form so it was with a tinge of nostalgia that she turned to walk away, sure he would return to ignoring her. She barely caught the whispered and painfully sincere, “Thank you.”  After that, the boy, whose name was only slightly bizarre and considering she spent most of her time in Fillory that was saying something, never ignored her again and after a while, she had come to consider him a dear friend. One of the first true ones she had made since beginning this second childhood. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <strong>Lily Evan’s Magic and Friendship </strong>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <em>
    <span>Since</span>
  </em>
  <span> they had discovered they lived on the same street it had become a habit to walk home together after school. Often they would stop at the small playground for a time and play or chat before splitting up to head to their respective homes. She’d learned quickly not to ask</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Severus about his home life after an offhand comment had resulted in a full week of the silent treatment. So she tried to ignore the bruises and haunted eyes, and if she had been an actual child she might have been able to but she was an adult and a child she had become fond of was suffering. Sometimes when he would stare blankly ahead of him and rub unconsciously at his hurts she was reminded painfully reminded of her brother Martin and in those moment’s she felt her itch to perform magic and curse his horrid father ten ways to Sunday but she couldn’t and so she settled for breaking her one rule. He had come to school with a limp and during school and on the walk home, he started to sweet and cringe every time he put weight on it. Finally, she had enough and led him to the large tree at the edge of the playground. She helped him to sit and the sigh he let out was equal parts relief and confusion. They had planned to go straight home today as Petunia had a recital she wanted Lily and their parents to attend. While not wanting to miss her sister’s event she felt in her heart that this was more important and hopefully her sister would understand. Taking a deep breath she placed her hands on her friend’s leg and for the first time since starting this new life, she let her magic have free reign. She felt the warmth in her bones expand outward from her to Severus and heard his gasp but was too focused on healing his leg to respond and see how her friend was taking the reveal.</span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She</span>
  </em>
  <span> felt a hand placed over her own and after ensuring his leg was healed properly she opened her eyes. Severus was looking at her with something like awe. He didn’t appear frightened of which she was grateful. His next words shocked her to her core. “Lily you...magic...you have magic too.” She stiffened. “What did you say?” Severus was smiling, something he rarely did, another similarity he shared with her brother when he was a child. It transformed his face,  for while he would never be considered handsome, the way it opened his face and brought attention to his dark eyes was arresting.  He held her hand tightly. “You have magic! How long have you known?” To say Lily was lost would be an understatement. She had picked this world for its lack of magic and suddenly her friend made it plain that magic did exist here. “A witch?” She asked dazedly. Severus seemed to realize something. “Of course you’re a mud...muggle-born you wouldn’t know. He then proceeded to tell Lily about the Wizarding World and for once Lily had no idea what to do. </span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He asked her how she knew how to heal his leg. “I don’t know...it was instinctive.” She said and he tilted his head like a curious bird but didn’t ask more. They laid back down under the tree and Severus caught one of the falling flowers. Holding it in his open hand he focused and she watched as it began to bloom before returning to its bud form and blooming again. “It’s beautiful.” She told him and he smiled again nodding in agreement. His cheeks were flushed with excitement. “You're only the second witch I’ve met.” She wondered out loud who was the first and he replied. “My mother.” She asked tentatively if his father was a witch too. He scowled and shook his head. “No he’s just a stupid muggle, at her confused look he explained, He’s</span>
</p><p>
  <span>non-magical. The Wizarding World calls all non-magical people Muggles.” Lily held her hand out for the flower he was playing with and began to mimic him while floating the flower just above her palm. They were both smiling when a horrible screech caused them to jerk away from each other. She looked for the source and found her sister staring at the flower floating above her hand in horror. “Freak! The both of you. I’m telling Mom and Dad, Lily, they’ll send you away for sure!” With a last disgusted look, she ran back the way she had come towards their home. Severus had paled further looking fearfully at Lily. “It’s alright Sev my parents won’t send me away. They’ll understand. Severus didn’t look so sure and rubbing his leg seemed reluctant to let her go home but she insisted and they parted. As she walked home she wondered if she was as confident as she had appeared to Sev. How would they react? She knew she didn’t really have to worry she could easily erase their memories if they reacted badly but she hoped that wouldn’t prove necessary. </span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Her</span>
  </em>
  <span> parents were in the living room clearly only just having got back from her sister’s recital. She could hear Petunia crying from their shared room. Her parents looked bewildered as they stood by the sofa. “Mom, Dad I have something I need to tell you...you should probably sit down for this.” She proceeded to tell them about magic or at least the magic here as explained to her by Severus. They didn’t believe her at first but after she used her magic to make them tea they started to. By the end of their talk, neither parent seemed angry or hateful like Petunia had predicted and when they had gathered her into a warm hug she found herself lost for words to describe how grateful she was. She could work on her sister. First, she would apologize for missing her recital. </span>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Lily turns eleven and discovers the wizarding world. </p><p>*this chapter was added to on 09/16/2020 to include her first trip to diagon ally</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u">
    <strong>Chapter Three</strong>
  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <strong>Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry</strong>
  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Severus</span>
  </em>
  <span> had warned her that someone would come from Hogwarts to explain magic to her parents and her when she turned eleven. She was still shocked when an older woman in clothes that reminded her of her first childhood turned up at the door with a letter of invitation to Hogwarts. Her parents questioned the woman thoroughly and at first, Lily was worried that the woman would be annoyed by this but instead, she seemed pleased that her parents were so engaged and protective. It wasn’t until her sister walked in with two of her friends that the meeting turned sour. Petunia said goodbye to her friends and then asked if her parents were </span>
  <em>
    <span>finally</span>
  </em>
  <span> sending Lily away. While her parents were shocked at this attitude she wasn’t. Ever since Petunia had seen Severus and her perform magic she had been distant, even hostile towards Lily, all of their earlier camaraderie gone as if it had never existed. She had tried to explain things to her sister but had been met with hissed threats and sharp jabs from boney elbows. So while she wasn’t shocked she was angry enough to act the age she pretended. “You're just jealous. Another thing I can do that you can’t and it kills you doesn’t it that I’m not ordinary as you.” Right after she said it she regretted it. “Petunia...I didn’t mean that.” Petunia’s eyes glistening hissed out a final. “I hate you, Lily,”  before running upstairs and slamming the bedroom door. Lily flinched and looked at her parents. “I didn’t mean it.” Her mother held her hand. “I know Lily but you still hurt her.” She couldn’t help but reply. “She hurt me first.” Her dad nodded. “One of you has to be the bigger person and make amends.” She nodded begrudgingly and after saying goodbye to a sympathetic Professor McGonagall went up to try and make amends. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>A</span>
  </em>
  <span> week later with Severus in tow, the family minus Petunia found their way to Diagon Alley. Severus’s mother joined them using her wand to spell the brick wall open with a nostalgic smile. One Lily had never seen on the usually solemn-faced woman. In moments like this, she could see what Eileen Snape must have looked like before a bad marriage and estrangement from magic had taken its toll. The stooped shoulders gradually straightened the longer they walked down the street immersed by the buzz and hum of magic thick and sweet like syrup in the air. In place of an unhappy housewife stood a proud and elegant witch. She looked at Severus and he gave her one of his rare hardwon smiles as they made their way to exchange their muggle funds for wizard coin. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>After</span>
  </em>
  <span> being fitted for both school and casual robes ended with much complaining on Severus's part, who didn't understand while anyone needed several sets of school uniforms. They headed to the Apothecary which both children agreed was much more fun. It reminded her of when she had been a healer in Fillory and a field nurse during WWII. Many of the less exotic ingredients were familiar to her. She had journeyed back to WWII to help in the war effort as a way to honor her eldest brother Rupert. She had seen him off and on during the war but never revealed herself. This was the only goodbye she would allow herself. She watched as he sacrificed himself at the Battle of the Bulge and left for Fillory not soon after. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Aunt</span>
  </em>
  <span> Maude had left the old Darras Place to Rupert and his family. He and his wife had moved in but not before Rupert had hidden the clock away for safekeeping. She had returned for his funeral and wished his widow and two daughters well. She never returned to that house or saw her nieces again. Both had died of old age which had pleased her, no hard deaths, no violent ends.  The Chatwin name was left to dust and she was glad for it. It had only ever been bad luck. Father and brother both lost to war, mother to sickness, one sister to magic, and another to madness. Even Aunt Maude hadn't escaped the Chatwin curse dying along with her husband at sea. Only she and Martin remained and they were destined for equally violent ends she was certain. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She</span>
  </em>
  <span> did not recover her good mood until they reached Flourish and Blotts and were happily set loose on the isles by exhausted parents. Severus stood beside her as they searched. "You seem to be feeling better Lily." She could hear the question in his voice but shook her head. "It's nothing Sev." He looked like he wanted to push further but just as he went to speak their parents appeared to usher them to Ollivander's Wand Shop. She talked Severus into going first so that she could study the process. She doubted a wand would choose her but she wanted to try mostly for curiosity her greatest foe.  It only took Severus three wands before great sparks flew from his wand. It was 13.5 inches, Silver Lime, Curupira hair. "My, my, a unique wand for a unique wizard." Said the wandmaker to Severus who nodded but refused to take his eyes off the wand gripped gently in his right hand. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Then</span>
  </em>
  <span> it was her turn. After a dozen wand's rejected her she decided the novelty had worn off and froze the room suspending them all in animation as she swiftly altered their memories. Grabbing a wand that had previously rejected her but less spectacularly than the others, she unfroze everyone. "Congratulations young miss, '' said the wandmaker after a moment, 10 1/4, Willow, Dragon heartstring very swishy. A good wand for a bright girl."  As they left she could feel the old man's puzzled eyes follow her and decided it was best to avoid him in the future. His eyes saw too much; she was sure of that. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>After</span>
  </em>
  <span> the shopping was done the group had a late lunch and then returned home. She bid Severus farewell and then headed up to her room to put away her purchases. She passed her sister's room and cautiously knocked but no one answered although she could hear her puttering around in there. She knew when she left for Hogwarts the relationship they had shared would be over. It hurt but she had lost sisters before. It was nothing she couldn't survive. Magic was an addiction. She had been a fool to think she could quit it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>By</span>
  </em>
  <span> the time she found herself on the train to Hogwarts with a nervous and quiet Severus, she had managed civility between her sister much to her relief. While magic was different here, using a wand for one, it was similar enough that with a bit of glamour and misdirection she could fit in. Finding a wand that fit her had been impossible but luckily only her parents had been there so with a bit of mind magic on them and the odd wandmaker she had picked a wand and glamoured it to hide the fact the wand didn’t work for her.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It</span>
  </em>
  <span> wasn’t long after the train had begun to move that a commotion outside their compartment drew their attention from their respective books. Her’s being the esteemed </span>
  <em>
    <span>Hogwarts, A History. </span>
  </em>
  <span>The door was slammed open and four laughing eleven-year-olds fell into a heap at their feet. The first to pop up was a mop-headed boy with glasses and a silly grin. He helped his friends up before grinning and with an exaggerated bow said. “Well hello there fair lady may I say falling at your feet was a rare pleasure.” His friends snickered behind him. Lily found herself both annoyed at this child’s clumsy attempt at flirting as well modestly amused. “This is our compartment you so rudely entered without an invitation I might add. Perhaps you should do us both a favor and leave.” Snape’s unusually deep voice broke the weird staring contest she and the boy seemed to have begun. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The </span>
  </em>
  <span>group turned to Sev and their playful demeanor fell away to be replaced with one of distaste like Sev was a particular kind of pest they wished to get rid of. Lily’s hackles were raised when a voice behind the other boy hissed. “Did anyone ask your opinion? Because I know I didn’t and James was talking to the girl so really why are you even speaking!” Severus’ face turned a splotchy red with temper and before he could eviscerate the stupid boy Lily spoke up. “He was simply asking what we both were thinking. It’s common courtesy to knock and introduce oneself before attempting to insult a complete stranger for no other reason than being rightfully incensed by such deplorable behavior.” Her voice was ice cold and her eyes pinned the boys to the spot, finally stripping the one who had attempted to flirt with her of his smile. The one with the interesting scars cleared his throat as Severus smiled at her. “We apologize, miss, we didn’t mean any offense, and of course your right we were being very rude. My name’s Remus Lupin and these are my friends- James Potter, the boy who looked at her as if she had kicked his puppy nodded, Sirius Black, the rude boy sneered down at her, and Peter Pettigrew, this small rotund boy hadn’t even registered having hidden behind the others.” She nodded at them all and replied in kind. “Thank you for your apology, Remus. I am glad that at least one of you possesses manners. My name is Lily Evans, she heard the dark-haired one mutter “of course she’s a muggle-born”, and this is my friend Severus Snape.” Snape spoke up after this, a dark expression on his face likely having heard Black’s comment. “Now that we’ve all been introduced could you kindly vacate OUR compartment. We were having a lovely evening and would like to get back to it presently.” Black went to speak likely to say something else insulting but Potter and Lupin both nodded and manhandled him out of the compartment. Severus immediately waved his wand, shutting and locking the door. Lily sent him a grateful look and decided she would avoid the annoying quartet in the future. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span> <span class="u"><strong>Sorting Hat Blues </strong></span></span>
</p><p> </p><p><em><span>Lily</span></em> <span>loved everything about Hogwarts. She found herself quite enchanted, despite it reminding her so much of Castle Whitespire that sometimes she found it hard to breathe. She was often awash in memories both good and bad but often Severus’s gentle probing or sharp comments would drag her out of the past. She was so glad to have met him. She did not think she could have handled this without his steady presence.</span></p><p> </p><p>
  
  <em>
    <span>The</span>
  </em>
  <span> sorting had not been what she expected. Not an exam like at Brakebills but a hat unimaginatively named The Sorting Hat. Sitting down on that little brown stool and having a semi-sentient hat dive into her head and sift through her memories like the most thorough of librarians, had been both alarming and invasive. Thankfully the hat had reassured her that anything it found inside her head would be between it and her just as its creator Godric Gryffindor had wanted. They had spoken at length and she had learned she hadn’t been the first </span>
  <em>
    <span>otherworlder</span>
  </em>
  <span> the hat had sorted. This had been intriguing but she had quickly been reminded when she had begun to question the hat on her predecessors about that pesky confidentiality spell. It wasn’t long before the hat shouted, “Gryffindor!”  She found a seat and eagerly awaited her friends sorting hoping he would end up in Gryffindor despite his staunch belief that he would be sorted into Slytherin like his mother and all his Prince ancestors. Black who had been sorted into Gryffindor before her and looked unnaturally pale and quiet hadn’t even looked at her when she’d sit down beside him with the other newbies. If he hadn’t been such a prick she would have asked if he was unwell but instead she ignored him and spoke to the third year sitting across from her. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <em>
    <span>Lupin</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Pettigrew, and Potter were all also sorted into Gryffindor much to her displeasure and this seemed to help Black’s mood. Then it was Severus’s turn and just like he predicted he was sorted into Slytherin. She hid her disappointment and waved at him. He smiled and waved back but the boy beside him spoke to him and Severus turned to engage him. His face growing morose and tense the more the boy spoke. She was concerned but was unable to catch Severus’s attention for the rest of the sorting or the feast that came after and in the madness that was the dismissal to their dorms she lost him and unsure where the Slytherin dorms were decided to wait until tomorrow to speak to him. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I couldn't find out what Snape's wand was so I chose Silver Lime with Curupira Hair wand core. I really think it suits him.<br/>*<br/>In the Magicians the siblings go to live with their aunt and meet their writer neighbor Plover. I pictured it as a stately townhouse named Darras Place which their aunt willed to the eldest upon her death as she never had children.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>
  <b>Chapter Four </b>
</p><p>
  <span class="u">
    
    <b>Year 1</b>
    <span> 1971</span>
  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She</span>
  </em>
  <span> had hoped her dorm mates would be tolerable and when she was escorted up to the tower and the circular room that housed six beds draped in red and gold she found herself pleasantly surprised. The girls decided to introduce themselves properly before calling an end to an exciting but exhausting day.  The first to speak was one the one to take the bed to her right. Her name was Oshun Warren and she was a muggleborn like Lily. She lived with her parents and two sisters in London and was the first witch in her family. A sentiment shared by Lily and another girl who had chosen the bed on the other side of Oshun. Mary Macdonald was an Irish witch who lived in Galway with her parents and siblings. She had never been away from home and was already terribly homesick.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <em>
    <span>It</span>
  </em>
  <span> was then, a sneering voice chimed in. “Oh lovely we’re surrounded by mudbloods Zoti. I knew this would happen when that dratted hat showed Gryffindor.” the girl who spoke had chosen the bed beside Mary although she looked like she was regretting her choice. Lily stared at the brunette sharing a commiserating laugh with the blonde-haired girl beside her. She thought the girl would be quite lovely if her face hadn’t been disfigured by the rather Severus-worthy scowl. The girl on the bed to her left had gasped at the insult. “</span>
  <span>¡Qué grosera eres!” </span>
  <span>Whispered the girl. Turning to her the brunette asked. “And you are?” The girl stiffened and calmly answered. “I am Maria Escamilla. I was born in Spain but moved to St. Ives with my abuelas  and sister four years ago.” The other girl seemed surprised at the girl's last name. “Escamilla? You're a pureblood.” The girl nodded. “Yes but I still think what you said was very rude and you should apologize to Mary, Oshun, and Lily.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The</span>
  </em>
  <span> girl narrowed her eyes. “I am Amarna Muffet and I won’t apologize for stating the truth. Just because you're a blood traitor doesn’t mean we are, isn't that right Zotia?” The blonde nodded. Maria spoke again. “Aren’t you Zotia Kaczka a halfblood yourself?” The blonde paled and then reddened with anger. “I still know to stick with my own.” Before things could escalate into an all-out fight the prefect that had shown them up appeared and called lights out. Lily thought the girls' timing impeccable. Intense silence the girls changed and climbed into the bed. Lily hoped Severus was having an easier night. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It</span>
  </em>
  <span> seemed that night had cemented the relationship between the girls. Lily quickly became attached to confident Oshun, ever-smiling Mary, and sweet Maria and she became just as disparaging of arrogant Amarna and simpering Zotia. The constant clashing of the two groups was the reason she gave herself for why it took so long for her to make the startling discovery that </span>
  <em>
    <span>Hogwarts was sentient.</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p><em><span>At</span></em> <span>first, when she felt the strange magic probing her own she had feared her brother had found her but the magic wasn’t malicious simply curious. When she realized it was alive and aware she became utterly fascinated with it. Her study of the castle’s magic led her to find an extraordinary room that conjured anything you wished. She had it replicate her cottage in the Clockwork Barrens that she escaped to when she was feeling particularly homesick. This is also where she came when Potter and his cronies pestered her beyond tolerance. Something that had begun almost as soon as classes had. The prepubescent boy had somehow got it into his head that he was </span><em><span>in love </span></em><span>with her. Which was preposterous as she could count the number of conversations they had on one hand and most of those were her berating him for his behavior towards Slytherins. She didn't like his habit of ignoring rules either. Rules that as an adult she realized were for everyone’s safety and should be obeyed with due diligence. </span></p><p><em><span>While</span></em> <span>her friendships with Maria, Oshun, and Mary were progressing well and she found herself truly enjoying their company despite the age difference. Her relationship with Severus was strained. Slytherin’s blood purist beliefs made their association difficult for Severus, who as a half-blood was already looked down on by his peers. However, when she spoke of perhaps hiding their friendship to help him. His harsh response had made it clear that despite the difficulty he desired to continue their friendship. Her free time was split between the girls and Severus and her first year of Hogwarts ended with them both excited for the next year.</span></p><p>
  <br/>
  <em>
    <span>That</span>
  </em>
  <span> summer her parents planned a family vacation to the beach. She had asked for permission to invite Severus and her parents had agreed as long as his parents approved. Luckily with a bit of (magical) persuasion, his ill-tempered father had agreed. The seaside village was a welcome change and the little house they rented had its own small beach. Even Petunia seemed to relax and even speak civilly with Severus and her. On the last day before they were to return home, Severus sat beside her on the beach every bare inch covered in sunscreen and a wide brim hat on his head. When he looked her way he smiled. “Thanks for inviting me, Lily. I haven’t had such a nice summer...” he hesitated and looked unsure how to continue. She lifted her hand and held it out to him knowing he did not like the uninvited touch, he took it in his and squeezed it once before returning his gaze to the ocean. They did not speak for the rest of the afternoon. There was nothing to say. </span>
</p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <b>Year 2</b>
    <span> 1972 </span>
  </span>
</p><p> </p><p><em><span>Returning</span></em> <span>for her second year led to her discovering of Thestrals and the fact that she could see them and what that meant. It had been a bitter start to the year that she tried to put out of her mind. This year the welcoming feast was interrupted by exploding candles which leaked red and gold glitter all over the shocked first years waiting to be sorted, and later that night many muttered darkly when they realized the glitter wouldn’t come off even with cleaning spells. Thankfully the glitter only lasted three days and then vanished on its own much to the relief of even the most fanatic Gryffindor. </span></p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>This</span>
  </em>
  <span> year saw a burst of pranks and while they tended to focus mainly on the Slytherins no one was truly safe even the teachers weren’t spared. The cretins called themselves the Marauders and signed their work in the most obnoxious way possible. They were clearly proud of themselves and wanted everyone to know it. When asked her opinion on the pranksters she voiced her disapproval however, the mischievous part of her, the one that loved to team up with Martin against their older more pretentious siblings was reluctantly impressed. Somehow she was never caught in the pranks and while at first, she figured it was luck that had spared her it continued to the point where luck was beginning to look like culpability and even her dear friends began to suspect the pranks were hers. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>This</span>
  </em>
  <span> year she also began to receive attention from an unwelcome </span>
  <em>
    <span>admirer</span>
  </em>
  <span> in the shape of an arrogant and smarmy James Potter. After he asked her to be his girlfriend and was promptly turned down he began a ridiculous campaign to get her. “I’ll change your mind, Lily Evans, you can be sure of that!” he had said so sure of himself. After that, he sent her flowers and little trinkets at least once a week. She returned the gifts but kept the flowers which </span>
  <em>
    <span>were</span>
  </em>
  <span> quite lovely. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>After </span>
  </em>
  <span>Christmas break, Lily and Severus returned to a more subdued Hogwarts. While Lily had known of the self-styled dark lord. A man who spewed hate and courted Pureblood elites with tales of a return to a more </span>
  <em>
    <span>pure</span>
  </em>
  <span> Wizarding World and the expulsion of muggle-borns and the changes to the culture they bring with them. She had been largely unconcerned. She had read about many of the past dark lords and aside from two or three most had never been any real threat and so she expected this Lord Voldemort to be the same but after inquiring about the somber mood Maria had replied. “People had been disappearing, mostly those who had spoken out against </span>
  <em>
    <span>Him, </span>
  </em>
  <span>she shuddered, but a few nights ago he attacked the Makenzie’s, she looked close to tears, the entire family...just gone.” She shook her head and stared down at the Daily Prophet. “He carved “</span>
  <em>
    <span>blood traitor” </span>
  </em>
  <span>onto Lord Mackenzie's head,” Oshun spoke up then. “Lord Mackenzie was one of the few Purebloods fighting for muggle-born and squib rights. He fought for </span>
  <em>
    <span>us</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” She looked at Lily and her eyes were filled with anger. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <em>
    <span>“Maybe </span>
  </em>
  <span>he should have kept his mouth shut and stuck with his own.” She looked over at Amarna's smug face and fought the urge to hit her. Beside her, Zotia looked conflicted at Amarna’s words but as usual, agreed when Amarna looked at her. Oshun, however, did not hold back and threw her glass full of pumpkin juice right into Amarna’s face. She shrieked and the Great Hall quieted. “You stupid strumpet how dare you!” Oshun stood and smirked. “I dare and happily so you hateful shrew. A family died, show some respect.” Before Amarna could reply Professor McGonagall was by their seat, her eyes sharp and her voice cold. “Girls you will follow me to my office at once!” Amarna and Oshun visibly cringed but obediently followed the professor out of the Great Hall. Looking at Maria who was shaking her head. "Oshun’s temper is almost as bad as yours.” Lily looked at her. “I’m surprised you were able to hold your tongue.” Lily raised her eyebrows. “Who said she won’t find spiders in her bed tonight.” Mary looked at Maria and smiled before shivering. “I hate spiders.” Lily chuckled. “Yeah so does she.” </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Part One</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Summer of '73 and Lily's trip to Diagon Alley takes a horrible turn.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>Chapter Five </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>
    <span class="u">Part One: Year 3 1973</span>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <strong>Summer before third year</strong>
  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The</span>
  </em>
  <span> new year brought more chaos. The attacks had increased and a visible tension ran through the wizarding world. Diagon Alley was so different this year. The streets were practically deserted many shops were boarded up and people walked around hunched over with darting eyes and worried faces. Her father pulled her closer, a troubled look on his face. This year her mother had been sick and unable to go with her to pick up her school supplies. Petunia (happy for the excuse) had stayed to look after her. Her father had been wary of her returning to school, but she had convinced him Hogwarts was both isolated and safe. Watching people scurry about made her wonder if she’d been mistaken. </span>
</p><p> </p><p><em><span>They</span></em> <span>had just come out of Flourish and Blotts when the screaming started. She felt wards going up and instinctively grabbed her father's hand. The wards were likely anti-apparition and anti portkey wards. “Dad, we need to get off the street.” She hissed tugging at him frantically to move before the inevitable...and then they appeared. Smoky, black shadows at first before condensing into masked figures clothed in back hooded robes and smiling menacingly. The moment they appeared wand's raised and dark curses on their lips, she knew they had to get off the street </span><em><span>now</span></em><span>. Tugging harder on her dad she pulled him back into the shop just as the owner was warding the door shut. Eyes big as tarsiers Mr. Blotts ushered them and a group of shoppers into the back room. Her father held her tightly to him. “Do you have a fireplace? Can we floo out of here?” Mr. Blotts shook his head. “They’ve shut down the floo.” Just as he said it the building was rocked, and an explosion shook the shop causing books to fly off the shelf, some of the more sentient wailing in fear. Screams and cruel laughter spilled in from the outside along with the stink of smoke and spellfire. The small back room held nine of them. Mr. Blotts, three families, and two teens. She recognized one of them as they crouched in a circle. “Your name's Frank Longbottom right?” The freckled teen nodded with a grimace. “Lily Evans yeah?” She returned his nod. </span></p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It</span>
  </em>
  <span> was then that a crack appeared in the ward stone situated in the corner. Someone outside was trying to rip them down. Mr. Blotts stood abruptly and dashed over to the ward stone wand up and muttering spells trying desperately to hold the wards together. The strain on his face was clear for everyone to see. He was losing the fight and with a great, shrieking groan the wards popped out of existence, and all was silent. The group stained to hear any noise and apart from the muffled shouts nothing until with ominous intent the shop’s door opened. A woman, stern-faced crept to the backroom door and tried to put up a ward. She was interrupted when the door was blasted open and splitters of wood flew knocking her back into her worried son. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>When</span>
  </em>
  <span> the dust settled a man stood at the entrance a face covered with a white mask and only his malodorous eyes on display. He studied them for s second. “My, My look here darling, '' he spoke as a woman appeared behind him, a little herd of frightened mudbloods and blood traitors (here he looked at Frank’s mother).” The woman spoke then draping herself on the man’s broad back. “Poor ‘ittle nasties best to put them out of their misery.” Lily recognized that voice although she‘d never met the woman she had met her sister in passing. Narcissa had always looked at her as if smelling something foul. She had often spoken of her elder sisters. Especially the volatile eldest Bellatrix. The man before her was broad-shouldered and auburn-haired. He reminded her clearly of Rabastan so this must be his brother she thought, a man known for his ruthlessness. This situation had spiraled quickly from bad to worse, and without giving her true identity away and using her chaos magic she could do little. It was another man dressed in slacks and a button-up who gave them the chance they needed. Jumping up he rammed himself against Lestrange and both his clinging wife and him tumbled backward. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <em>
    <span>Frank</span>
  </em>
  <span> and she looked at each other and without words moved as one, casting spells at the enraged couple. They quickly regained their feet as behind them the group darted for the entrance. The couple has jumped to their feet and held their wands out to curse the fleeing group but a blast from Mrs. Longbottom sent them flying back into a bookcase of angry books that began furiously attacking the couple. Taking the distraction and without looking back she grabbed her father’s hand and ran. They’d almost made it to the Alley’s entrance when her father’s hand slipped from her own. She turned back to see why he’d let go and found him crumpled on the ground face smooth and eyes glazed. Behind him in robes of crimson and a shark's smile stood the dark lord himself-a bit of green still smoking lazily out of his wand. She </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew</span>
  </em>
  <span> what that meant and she knew she couldn’t lose another family. Enlarging her bracelet she held the time key and with tears running down her face, silent as the grave she rewrote time, and the world shifted out of focus.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <b>Interlude in Space Time </b>
  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>In the darkness, she floated. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Around her, a voice both loud as a scream and soft as a whisper spoke to her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It commanded her to listen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span> A god no doubt they always sounded so fucking self-important.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span> A sharp stab at her head had her crying out and the voice growled. “Listen here time mage and listen well. This is not your world, not your home and you will not mettle in time here. This is my world and my design and just because you’ve written yourself into it without my permission mind you doesn't mean you get to do whatever you want.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Here the voice lifted the darkness just enough for Jane to make out a woman with eyes like stars and skin like the sky at night. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“ While you are in this world you will follow its rules. I let you keep your brand of magic (your welcome) but time magic is prohibited outside of time turners.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tears flowing down her face Jane/Lily shook her head. “You don’t get it he’s gone I have to get him back. I just need to go back a moment and…” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The being shook her head. “No, it is you who don't understand. In this world, you can’t wave a hand and bring back the dead. Death is meaningful. Its pain has a purpose. You are all you have suffered and more. This too will shape you. In your world magic comes from pain, remember. So use your pain. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The goddess held out her hand and touched a single finger to Jane’s no Lily’s forehead. The pain was sudden but brief and when it subsided she opened her eyes. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She was still there standing in front of a grinning Dark Lord</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span> with her father’s cooling corpse between them. </span>
  </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Part Two</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“Don’t touch her!” Petunia shouted as the priest just in the doorway of the church hurried back. Lily stepped away as the priest knelt with Petunia. Her sister looked over the priest's shoulders and mouthed one word. “Go!” Lily's chest tight and feeling faint herself she nodded. She turned and walked away.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>Chapter Five </b>
</p><p>
  <b>Part Two</b>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She was still there standing in front of a grinning Dark Lord</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span> with her father’s cooling corpse between them. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The</span>
  </em>
  <span> Dark Lord stood before her as the chaos surrounding them faded out. She knew it was still there but all she could see was his self-satisfied smirk all she could hear is his chuckles. The pain on her face amused him. Her brief flinch as he laughed stroked his ego. He was just like Martin only able to feel when making others suffer. Heartless and cruel and so full of hate and rage it was palpable. At that moment she didn’t see the Dark Lord; she saw her brother. Her awful brother who took and took from their family until only they were left. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>At</span>
  </em>
  <span> that moment all she could feel was rage and pain and hate and before he could open his mouth to mock her grief she lifted her wand and spoke a spell of her own making. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Putrescat</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span> in corde”</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she shouted, and caught off guard the Dark Lord did not move quickly enough to avoid the strange smoky spell. It hit him just on his right arm and he cursed loudly drawing his minions attention. Just then she felt the anti-apparition wards fade and Auror’s appear, wands raised for battle. It was enough of a distraction that Lily could make her escape holding the weight of her father as she fled. She didn’t care if she was seen. If asked she would say she learned apparition illegally and face the consequences. Despite the curse she had thrown at the Dark Lord it was her heart that felt like it was rotting away. She cursed the goddess who had stopped her from saving her father and she cursed herself for forgetting the truth-</span>
  <em>
    <span>Magic </span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>is </em>
  </b>
  <em>
    <span>pain</span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>.</em>
  </b>
  
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The</span>
  </em>
  <span> funeral was held a week later. The family drove to the funeral home in silence. They hadn’t spoken to each other since she had appeared in the garden cradling her father’s corpse wailing how </span>
  <em>
    <span>sorry</span>
  </em>
  <span> she was. Her mother’s scream upon finding them haunted her still. Petunia’s burning, hate-filled eyes followed her constantly. It wasn’t until after the funeral as they stood at the gravesite saying goodbyes to all of the colleagues, friends, and students that had cared for Edgar Evans that the explosion she knew was coming finally arrived. The priest that had baptized them (or Petunia and a fake memory Lily anyway) was hugging her and telling her how much her father had spoken of her, that her sister finally lost her composure.</span>
</p><p> </p><p> <em><span>“Stop</span></em><span> it, '' she shouted at the Priest, stop acting like she’s a victim here. It’s her fault my father is dead. She’s a curse to this family. Everything she touches rots.” The priest tried to calm her down by taking her in his arms but she broke away and raised her hand hitting Lily with all her might. Lily’s head snapped to the side and the smack of flesh on flesh echoed through the graveyard. Licking the blood from her lip she looked at the wild-eyed sister and said nothing. “I should have been an only child.” Lily flinched and couldn’t help but agree. All she had brought this family was grief. “Your right.” She croaked mouth suddenly dry. “Everything I touch turns to ash.” </span></p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It </span>
  </em>
  <span>was her mother who came forward then. She was ashen-faced and her shoulders caved inward. “Father Dan may we have a moment alone?” The priest seemed hesitant as he stared at her bleeding lip but he left back towards the church. Petunia turned to her mother. “It’s true mother can't you see now. I warned you she was rotten. I told…” Her mother's arms which had been wrapped around herself uncurled and she held up her hand. Petunia fell silent. “Your father wouldn’t want this. He loved you both and so do I. I can’t handle all this tension right now.” She sobbed and swayed on her feet and alarmed both daughters went to catch her as she collapsed but Petunia got to her first. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Don’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>touch her!” Petunia shouted as the priest just in the doorway of the church hurried back. Lily stepped away as the priest helped Petunia hold up her mother. Her sister looked over the priest's shoulders and mouthed one word. “Go!” Lily chest tight and feeling faint herself  nodded. She turned and walked away. She needed time away. Her grief filled her up in ways that threatened to drown her in memories. She turned back to her mother and sister. It wasn’t until this moment she realized how much alike they looked. Grief had aged them both. The same brown eyed and hair. The same pointed chins and long limbs. Petunia, all of fourteen and nearly as tall as their mother. Magic was pain and magic would have never touched this family if not for her. Looking one more time at the fresh grave of the man she had stolen from them she cast a spell. Not taking their memories of her but taking away their worry, their care and their love. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>They would not miss her but she would miss them. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p> <em><span>The</span></em><span> walk home was short and the drizzle matched her mood. When she got home it was to a ringing phone. “Hello.” She whispered. “Hello Lily, this is Priest Dan I wanted to inform you that an ambulance took your mother and sister to the hospital, her hand shook and he must have realized his mistake because he quickly added. “No no no nothing is wrong your sister just wanted to have her looked over.” Lily nodded and thanked him before hanging up. </span></p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>A</span>
  </em>
  <span> knock at the door had her opening it to find Severus. “I didn’t see you at the funeral.” She frowned. “I didn’t go. I wanted to but…” He shrugged and moved forward and suddenly she was in his arms and she was crying and it hurt so much.</span>
</p><p> </p><p> <em><span>Soon</span></em><span> after Severus had to leave. “I’ve been invited to spend the rest of the summer at Malfoy Manor. I already accepted or I would cancel and stay here with y…” She shook her head. “No, you go. Any chance to get away from that lout you call a father is good. Although I didn’t realize you were so close to Malfoy?” He stiffened and pulled away. “What jealous that you're no longer my only friend?” He sneered. Trying not to lose her temper she bit back. “No just surprised. He doesn’t seem the type to befriend anyone less than pure.” </span></p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She</span>
  </em>
  <span> realized as soon as she said it that the reminder of his muggle blood would not soothe his temper but suddenly she was spoiling for a fight. “Yes, Merlin forbid anyone of his ilk design to befriend the poor, little half-blood. Merlin forbid he help a fellow Slytherin constantly facing opposition for befriending a muggle-born.” He stood up and pulled on his jacket. “Especially an ungrateful one who doesn’t know her place.” She stood then and she snarled. “My place?” Enraged that he thought he was better than her she felt her hand hit his cheek before she could stop herself. Silence reigned and Lily stared at Severus in shock. “I didn’t...I’m so sorry Sev please.” Severus just stood there staring at her with some unnamed emotion in his dark eyes. Without a word he was gone and staring at her hand she wondered if she was always this person.</span>
</p><p> </p><p> <em><span>First</span></em><span>, she took advantage of the Evans and then Severus’s earnest friendship. It seemed like hurting people came naturally all of the sudden. Maybe her brother wasn’t the only monster in their family after all she’d just hit a friend who was regularly abused. She was no better than his father. Suddenly she couldn’t breathe. She had to get out of here. She packed her school trunk and shrunk it before grabbing her coat and calling the Knight Bus. </span></p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The</span>
  </em>
  <span> journey to the Leaky Cauldron was swift and nauseating after making her way into the tavern she politely asked for a room and after paying and asking to use the tavern’s owl sent a frantic post to Maria, Mary and Oshun. After she sent the posts off. She laid on the bed and numbly wondered if leaving as she did was the right thing. She must have fallen asleep because when she woke up to three pecking owls at her window it was dark outside. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She</span>
  </em>
  <span> let the birds in and thanked them, conjuring three owl biscuits as payment. They ate and waited patiently as she read. Both Oshun and Mary’s letters were full of concern but It was Maria’s post that pulled her from her stupor. Maria was especially concerned about her being alone near a place that had so recently been attacked and demanded she come to stay with her family for the rest of the summer. Stating that she had already gotten approval from her grandfather and that a house-elf would be there to pick her up in the morning. She wrote quick replies to each letter and sent them off with the owls before climbing into bed and drifting off again to nightmares of her father’s corpse and Martin’s smile. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>A</span>
  </em>
  <span> house-elf popped into her room early the next morning rousing her from dark dreams. She had nearly hexed the poor thing and they were still apologizing for startling her when they appeared in the foyer of a grand villa. Before she could take it in however she was accosted by a jasmine scented Maria. Her dear friend looked well wrapped in an elegant turquoise robe and white lace shawl. Her warm brown eyes gazed deeply into Lily’s who tried to avoid them lest she start crying again. “Oh, Lily.” She whispered voice heavy with empathy and just like that Lily remembered Maria truly understood. Her parents had died and her grandparents had moved the family here from Spain to escape the memories. “I miss him.” Maria held her tighter and grateful she let go. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Maria</span>
  </em>
  <span> lived with her family in a large villa on the cliff’s edge of St. Ives. The sound of the waves crashing below enthralled her as she stood on the balcony of her guest room. After crying in Maria’s arms she had finally calmed enough to be shown to her room after freshening up she had been introduced to Maria’s family. Her Abuelo “Call me Rafa.”, a short, bearded man with the same warm brown eyes had greeted her with a jovial smile and a side hug welcoming her to their home. Her Abuela Oriana was more intimidating, eyeing her for an uncomfortably long time before nodding and giving her condolences before ushering her to the table and demanding she eat. It was Maria’s bright-eyed baby sister Salome that captured her attention. Asking so many questions (especially about Hogwarts which she would be attending for the first time this year) and reminding her so much of herself at that age that she couldn’t help but be charmed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The</span>
  </em>
  <span> month she spent with the Escamilla’s was the balm she needed. Most days were spent on the beaches swimming and hunting for seashells and colorful stones for Salome’s growing collection. The nights were spent listening to stories from Rafa and Oriana’’s past each more colorful and outlandish than the last. The warmth and kindness of this family awed Lily most days but still, she longed for her own family. She had sent a post to her mother at Oriana’s stern “request” and the reply had been curt. Petunia stated that her mother did not feel up to replying and that staying away until their mother “healed” was best. Lily had not bothered to reply. She had expected this as the spell she cast on her mother had been meant to make her absence unnoticed. Petunia’s hate had made the need to spell her unnecessary but it had made her dismissal easier for Lily. When asked Lily had told them her family while grieving approved of her need to be away. Oriana muttered about grief making people cruel but Lily pretended not to hear. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Sooner</span>
  </em>
  <span> than she liked the summer ended and it was time to return to Hogwarts. Unable to face Diagon Alley Maria and she had owl ordered their supplies. Oriana had firecalled Twilfitt and Tattings and a representative had come by the villa to fit both Maria and her with a new wardrobe. While she had protested her inclusion the Escamilla’s had ignored her protests and called her familia and really what could she say to that. Soon enough the day came and Maria’s grandparent's side apparated the three of them  to Platform 9 ¾ and after an emotional hug, they stepped onto the train. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Putrescat in corde is Latin for rot in the heart </p><p>The spell does just that it rots the heart from the inside. It hurts like hell and is usually fast-acting and deadly but because it hit his arm and not his chest the process will be significantly slower but still painful. No don't he is pissed that a little girl got the drop on him.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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